Sanatan Sanstha and day of reckoning

Sanatan Sanstha had achieved one goal; it had won one battle but the war was far from over. The lady sadhak stood her ground and did not speak to her parents. They tried their level best to isolate her and speak to her alone. She refused point blank and did not allow sadhaks to leave her side. This action is important. We are recording everything and if needed can show video evidence that she did not want to meet her parents alone. She requested us to accompany her; she was doing this as per her free will, we were not pressurising her. Everything is as per the guidance of Dr Jayant Athavale. He uses all psychological tricks to ensure that the image of Sanatan Sanstha is not tarnished.

Firefight at Sanatan Ashram Panvel

The relatives burst out as expected and prodded by sadhaks at Sanatan Ashram Panvel. They take matters in their own hand and create a ruckus. The sadhaks try to intervene and move me from the danger zone. They are experts in this and don’t want me to get hurt. I should get some bruises to show at the press conference but should be physically safe. Sanatan Sanstha has a very important role for me. This has been decided at the baithak at Sanatan Ashram Ponda.

The relatives manhandle our sadhaks and also slap the lady sadhak. Our sadhaks don’t respond but ask the relatives to calm down and talk reasonably. This is all done for the cameras. The whole show is being filmed and will be shown at the press conference. We are getting good footage. This is exactly the kind of publicity we wanted. They threaten the inmates of the ashram and try to break a few pieces of furniture. They can only break some glass panes. As per the plan, we phone the police and request assistance. Simultaneously we also inform the press and media. They are waiting for our call and descend in hordes. Sanatan Ashram Panvel resembles a war zone.

The melee and Sanatan Sanstha

The melee is going on better than how we had visualised at Sanatan Sanstha. Unfortunately, the police have sent only one jeep, we expected them to provide full support with at least 3-4 jeeploads of policemen. We expected them to lathi charge us in front of media. I was against this right from the start. I wanted the circus to be more organised. However, Sanatan Ashram Panvel has organized a crowd (sadhaks in plain clothes) who are shouting against the parents. The girl, the chief guest, gets confused sometimes.

The police intervene in front of the media and separate the sadhaks and the relatives. Some sadhaks are hurt in the process. They take the lady sadhak to the police station and ask the crowd outside to disperse. The parents move to the police station and we also move in our own vehicles. Some sadhaks are already present as we don’t want to leave the lady sadhak alone even for a moment.

This moment is crucial. If she is alone even for a moment, she may relapse and revert to her original belief system. The presence of sadhaks will intimidate her and work on her mental processes. Dr Jayant Athavale is a genius in such psychological tricks.

Sanatan Sanstha has won this round.

Sanatan Sanstha uses my inherent talents

The new personality trait discovered by Sanatan Sanstha opens up a different opportunity and this is discussed at several forums inside Sanatan Ashram Ponda. I can handle public affairs very successfully and also divert attention from controversial topics. In short, I am very good at lying. I also handle some critical issues in a very calm and collected manner without getting flustered. This is probed further by sadhaks as they feel I can handle other situations quite efficiently.

Flight preparations at Sanatan Sanstha

Sanatan Sanstha wants to test my commitment to the cause of Dr Jayant Athavale and his vision of Hindu Rashtra. I have demonstrated time and again that I am totally committed, I have moved away from my family and antagonized even my parents in the process. It seems that Sanatan Ashram Ponda wants to test my resolve.

The number of runaways joining Sanatan Sanstha has slowed down to a trickle. Hardly anyone has run away from their homes and joined Sanatan Ashram Ponda. As a result, PR activities have nosedived. There is also a lull in subscriptions; people seem to have lost interest in us. Viewership of Dainik Sanatan Prabhat online has nosedived. Online viewership of Sanatan website is also down. We are desperately searching for an opportunity.

In such gloomy times, we suddenly receive news from one of our kendras that they have readied one girl. She is ready to leave her home. Though the reasons are personal; her family is marrying her off though she wants to continue her studies. A series of meetings are held and I am invited to be part of many such meetings. This gives me an eagle eyes view of the preparations.

One more test by Sanatan Sanstha

This is touted as a defining period in my association with Sanatan Sanstha. I must coordinate the whole episode and ensure that the parents are instigated and lash out publicly at Sanatan. I may even be moved to Sanatan Ashram Panvel for close coordination. A mobile with a different SIM is given to me. The sanstha thinks that my phone may have some eavesdropping software installed by either my husband or parents. I don’t think so but have now learned to keep quiet. I have faced several issues in the past on account of my nature. I don’t want to lose the faith of Dr Jayant Athavale again. I must succeed. It is pointed out that I had failed in my attempts of instigating my husband.

I am determined to succeed this time and showcase Sanatan Sanstha as a showcase of Hinduvta. A place that protects girls and women and saves their souls. This will define me and my role in Sanatan Ashram Ponda and I will not lose this opportunity.

Is this related to spirituality? Are our activities even moral? Do I have the courage to question the tactics? Leave alone questioning the tactics, I am acting as an active agent. I am provoking a woman to break away from her family. I could; Sanatan Sanstha could; talk to both the parties and work out a compromise in which the girl could study. But then this would not benefit Dr Jayant Athavale. Sanatan would not derive any mileage out of this. If we print such news, nobody would read Dainik Sanatan Prabhat.

Spirituality at Sanatan Ashram Ponda

What about spirituality at Sanatan Ashram Ponda? Am I really doing anything to increase my spiritual knowledge? Is Sanatan Sanstha teaching me about any significant spiritual practices? Well, if you consider personality defect removal process or PDR as a significant spiritual practice, then I spend a considerable part of my time in spiritual practice. I also attend several satsangs; the topics are generally repetitive and stress on Dr Jayant Athavale and his beliefs. Some of them are about naamjap and the importance of different names of God and which name we should chant. Overall, I must be spending about 4-6 hours daily in these activities, but as I am also involved in other sevas; I am part of the Swagat Kaksh at Sanatan Ashram Ponda, it is less.

Sevas equal Spirituality at Sanatan Sanstha

Other sadhaks at Sanatan Ashram Ponda spend considerable time doing naamjap. I know several sadhaks who would spend upwards to 10 hours in this chanting activity. They had several personality defects and the sanstha had advised them that chanting only could rid them of their personality defects.

All sadhaks had to participate in various activities inside the ashram. It operated as a cooperative society with responsibilities divided among the various members. We were not paid anything for the time and effort spent in these sevas. It was said that these sevas were meant to be part of our spiritual practices. I fail to understand how a service at the ashram qualifies as spiritual practices while the same done at one’s home does not. I could not raise such queries otherwise I would again have to do penance; I had experienced it many times. My attitude of questioning had landed me in hot waters

many times and though I had full faith in Dr Jayant Athavale, I was learning how to handle politics in Sanatan Sanstha. This was definitely politics; or was it? Was it a psychological method aimed at mind control. Was Sanatan using these techniques to strengthen their hold over us, using this to control our minds? Why were we unable to question such practises, why, we – independent women in our own rights, unable to raise our voices against injustices? Why were we helpless, why did we feel hopeless?

Spirituality at Sanatan Ashram Ponda

We give free service to Sanatan Ashram Ponda and equate it with spirituality. It is true across ashrams across India and maybe the rest of the world. There is nothing wrong about this. What is wrong is that only occupants of the ashram must give this seva. Outsiders, including sadhaks are not required to do this. They can spend their time as they want to. We stay at the ashram of Sanatan Sanstha and we do not or cannot pay for our lodging and boarding. The sanstha recovers the cost in this manner. They use us as slaves. As it is cloaked in spirituality, we do not feel a burden. But frankly, we are slaves of Dr Jayant Athavale both in mind and body. We are not independent; we cannot think independently. Sanatan Sanstha has taken away this ability from us and we are proud of this fact.

God, please help us to come out of this maya jaal. Only you can save us from Dr Jayant Athavale and Sanatan Sanstha. Many sadhaks staying at Sanatan Ashram Ponda pray to God to seek His intervention; He blesses only some of us.

Different personality at Sanatan Ashram Ponda

The reassignment of work at Sanatan Ashram Ponda is a blessing in disguise. I and Sanatan Sanstha discover a different and hidden aspect of my personality; I can handle stress; enormous amount of stress without losing my cool. I handle some very tricky situations at the swagat kaksh of Sanatan Ashram Ramnathi and in the process, earn some long-needed goodwill of high ranking sadhaks. These sadhaks are quite influential though they do not have any pompous sounding designations. Their words carry a lot of weight in Sanatan Sanstha and they are keeping a close watch on me. I thank Dr Jayant Athavale for all his blessings, only his blessings have made this possible otherwise I was down in the dumps.

A different persona Sanatan Sanstha

The different me is really a different persona at Sanatan Sanstha. I have handled two critical incidents at Sanatan Ashram Ponda and handled them in such a manner that there was a lot of goodwill generated for me and the sanstha. Both relate to some queries raised by the police department. In one situation, they are on the point of conducting a raid. I play them around till some significant persons disappear from the premises of Sanatan Ashram Ramnathi. I will not share the complete details; who knows the police or even Sanatan will try to silence me. Silence me in the same way they have silenced some troublesome sadhaks. Sanatan Sanstha does not trust anybody and if a person is privy to confidential knowledge or information, they take special care of them. Not my words but those uttered by a senior sadhak to my rakshak after I escaped from their clutches and ran away from Sanatan Ashram Ponda.

The other incident is not open to public consumption but relates to a police spy. The police had planted a spy in our midst but I could identify him very easily. He escaped with his life, I regretted it at that time. Dr Jayant Athavale had control over my mind and I could only think about him and his safety.

Another dimension of my personality

This different dimension of my personality opens a host of opportunities to the sadhaks of Sanatan Sanstha and to me as well. I can now be assigned to perform several high-level sevas. I am about to join a close-knit group within Sanatan Ashram Ponda; a group so well knit that hardly anybody is aware of it.

This development does not go down well with my rakshak. I am surprised as I felt that she would be very happy for me. I think it is envy. Though she has spent several years at Sanatan Ashram Ramnathi, she has never reached my level. She has a serious issue of personality defect; envy and that interferes with her spiritual progress. I have a serious talk with her one day but she does not reply to my accusations; in fact, she is silent throughout. She only looks at me with her soul-searching eyes.

I realize later on that I was entering a deep quagmire; one which would make it impossible to escape. But, I didn’t want to escape.  I wanted to be enveloped by the Chaitanya of Dr Jayant Athavale and his Sanatan Sanstha.

Reassignment at Sanatan Ashram Ponda

Sanatan Sanstha punishes me for a minor slip of the tongue at one satsang at Sanatan Ashram Ponda. I get very emotional about this but do not let it affect my resolve. I am firm that I will serve my Guru Dr Jayant Athavale and seek spiritual growth under his guidance. I am ready to enlist my daughter into the fold of Sanatan and also reach out to my husband. In short, I am ready to do anything. Anything except see the writing on the wall. The writing clearly says that Sanatan Sanstha practices mind control techniques; it lures women and men alike and controls their minds; makes them do what the sanstha wants.

 Swagat kaksh at Sanatan Ashram Ponda

I think my resolve wins in the end and I am reassigned to be part of the Swagat Kaksh at Sanatan Ashram Ponda. Every day I report to the main reception area. My job is to handle the telephone console and pass on important messages to the concerned sadhaks. I should be aware of the various activities of the ashram as well as arrival and departure of many important sadhaks. I am also responsible for informing them about any raids by police or any other government agencies. The responsibility is enormous as Sanatan Sanstha has been raided several times in the past. However, in most cases, they were unable to find what they were after. It is the responsibility of the Swagat Kaksh at Sanatan Ashram Ponda to give information as fast as possible so that necessary arrangements can be made.

I take this as a challenging job and handle all the calls.

Frantic relatives and a stone wall

I also serve as a stone wall between frantic relatives and runaway sadhaks. I must have encountered about a dozen such cases. When a runaway sadhak reaches Sanatan Ashram Ramnathi, we generally put a safety net over her. She is handled very carefully. The relatives may lure her away from Sanatan Sanstha else they may create a ruckus at the ashram premises. We actually like it if they create a scene and pick up a fight. Our media arm has good connections with sympathetic media organizations. These media persons can reach the ashram within minutes and cover the whole episode very well. They also give a sympathetic angle so that Sanatan comes out like a good organization being harassed by evil doers.

This has a ripple effect and our sadhaks who wish to fly away to the ashram are motivated to do so. We also attract several other seekers. The concerned sadhak also loses faith in her family and starts trusting Sanatan Sanstha completely. She becomes a permanent feature at Sanatan Ashram Ponda. She hands over control of mind to Dr Jayant Athavale.

Apart from this seva, I have to offer seva in the kitchen. Now, I get sufficient time to attend all satsangs and also participate in many activities. I get my food on time. I think that I am redeemed finally and Sanatan Sanstha has finally and totally accepted me.

I belong to Dr Jayant Athavale and Sanatan Sanstha.

My Daughter A Sanatan Sevak

Isn’t it funny that the only solution to regain Sanatan Sanstha’s trust was to make my daughter a Sanatan Sevak. I thought, at that time that this was a perfect solution. Sanatan had grounded me once again and this time, all my so-called perks and benefits had been withdrawn.

Cause and effect at Sanatan Ashram Ponda

Was this related to my prarabdha and Karma or was I part of a systematic plan at Sanatan Ashram Ponda? I was not in the mental condition to think this out; Dr Jayant Athavale had full control of my mind. He had taken charge of my sub-conscious and conscious mind through the various mind control techniques. A small insignificant comment had a very drastic effect.

As I realized later, Sanatan used such cause and effect principle on any sadhak they doubted on. This made a person like me do anything to stay in their good books. They would slowly tighten the screws so that the sadhak would no longer have any other alternative. There were several sadhaks at Sanatan Ashram Ponda who had undergone this process. The after-effects of repeated use were very negative and drastic. I have seen a person lose his mental stability after one such penance – cause and effect impact. This was the tipping point for me, I will come back later on this.

The solution and Sanatan Sanstha

Bringing my daughter under the fold of Sanatan Sanstha and getting her to live with me at Sanatan Ashram Ponda solved several problems in one go. First of all, I would be able to bring her up in the proper manner of Hindu Dharma. She would be taught all the Vedas and Shastra in proper Sanskrit. Though she has learning disabilities, I was sure that she would cope. Secondly, she would also start her spiritual journey at a very early age. Her progress would be very fast. I would also get her treated by the Chakra specialist as I felt that her main issue was Chakra imbalance. She would be an ideal patient on which to carry out several path-breaking experiments. I would also get some emotional company; I used to feel quite lonely and missed my family, especially during nights. Who knows, my husband would also follow both of us into Sanatan Sanstha. He could bear the loss of one but I was sure that he could not bear to part with both of us – we were the stars of his eyes.

The plan was to talk to my daughter when she was alone. I knew that if I tried to speak to her in my husband’s presence, she would not listen. I waited for several days before I made the call to the landline. Hoping that my daughter would pick up, I prayed to Dr Jayant Athavale to fulfill my wishes. My prayers were answered and my daughter, my beloved daughter picked up. I spoke very softly to her. But, her words chilled me to the bone. She said that she hated me and Sanatan Sanstha, hated me for what I had done to her father. She would not like to speak to me and hoped never to see me. She hated Sanatan Sanstha will all her heart.

I broke down, broke down because my daughter was surrounded by demonic forces. These forces were making her say this. She had lost her mental balance.

Rakshak to the defence – again

The shock is too much for me. I have not attended any session in the evening nor have I eaten dinner. I refuse to speak to anyone. I am not crying, I am beyond crying. For the time in more than 40 years, I feel I am alone; totally alone in this world. I hate my husband; he should have at least told me. Why did he always lie that they were okay? That they did not want to talk to me. Why did my little brother not talk to me?

A helping hand

I am lying on my bed; I am unable to sleep. All around me, sadhaks are going through the daily routine prescribed by Sanatan Ashram Ramnathi. I am all alone in this vast world. I feel like I am falling in a big black hole. I can only think of my father; waiting for his darling Barbie to come and see him. I think of running away, running away from Sanatan Sanstha for a day and dashing off to see my father.

I feel a hand on my head, a little after midnight, after everyone has gone to sleep. My rakshak whispers in my ear softly and asks me to follow her. She takes me to a small room, a small dark room and closes the door. She takes me in her arms and whispers in my ears. I cannot control myself and start crying – not sobbing but crying softly. She lets me cry my heart out. When I cannot cry anymore she gives me a glass of water and some biscuits to eat. I don’t know from where she has managed these. She is dependent on the sanstha’s handouts for her daily needs.

I tell her about the news, about my father, about his illness. I open up about everything, I open my heart out. And start crying again.

The morning after

Sometime during all this, she leads me to another room with a bed and makes me go to sleep. I wake up to find her sitting on a stool holding my hand and staring at nothing. She seems to be crying. I again drift into sleep.

She wakes me up at around 5 am. Asks me to freshen up and wash my face with cold water. After I am through, she preaches me, preaches about how life is not always a bed of roses. But, most important of all, she advices me on how to handle the situation. She tells me how Sanatan Sanstha functions and what actions they will take if they know that I am thinking of visiting my parents. She coaches me and coaxes me to remain firm, strong and behave as if everything is okay. I have to maintain my routine; I have to continue with life.

There is no escape; I cannot escape. It is my prarabdha and I have to live through it; I have to experience it myself. My karmas during this time will define what I am and what I can become.

Afternoon sessions and Sanatan Ashram Ramnathi

The pre-lunch sessions can stretch quite long as I have a tight schedule dictated by Sanatan Ashram Ramnathi. There are times when I miss my lunch. As Sanatan Sanstha has adviced me not to eat food outside, I spend many days without any proper food. It is a small sacrifice I make in the service of my Guru, Dr Jayant Athavale and I do not mind it at all; in fact, I am quite proud of this and other sadhaks praise this attitude.

Post-lunch Sessions and Satsangs

Even though I may not have eaten anything, I still must attend the afternoon satsangs. Several personality defects have been identified in the morning sessions and I must do penance to rid them from my inner self. This will enable me to lose myself and my identity. The subjects of these satsangs revolve around Gurukrupayoga, personality defect removal process, importance of Samashti seva as well as importance of traditions and different festivals as prescribed by Sanatan Dharma. Sanatan Sanstha has a very good collection of publications and through the scientific research conducted by Spiritual Science Research Foundation or SSRF in short, they have explained the scientific reasoning behind our traditions.

There are several repetitions in the subjects, I do not mind this. I am still a novice and have a lot to learn. I have sacrificed my life to sit in the lap of my Guru, Dr Jayant Athavale.

Post afternoon sessions

I leave for my prachar work as soon as the satsangs end. I spend about four hours in the morning and afternoon prachar sessions. The return to Sanatan Ashram Ramnathi is around 7 pm, just in time for a light dinner. Dinner is very simple and consists of rice and dal. The hectic schedule and the Chaitanya of the ashram ensures that my diet intake is very less.

I do not mind even though I have lost a lot of weight during the three months at Sanatan Ashram Ponda.

Once our dinner is over, we attend a session of personality defect removal process for a couple of hours. Then, we have free time. We spend this time discussing various issues facing the country and the excellent steps undertaken by Sanatan Sanstha to resolve them. Such discussions generally last for two to three hours and it is generally 11 pm by the time I go to sleep. I don’t feel like sleeping and hence I spend at least another hour or two in doing naamjap – chanting.

I am accountable to my time and feel that sleep is actually a waste of time. I should rather use this time for some productive work. Contacting my family is also a waste of time. I don’t have anything to discuss with them. I don’t attend to their calls most of the days. I hope they get the message and leave me alone. I will contact me when I need something from them, like clothes and money. Otherwise, they should not worry about me and disturb me in my seva. Sanatan Ashram Ramnathi is taking good care and has everything I need.

Rakshak and Sanatan Sanstha

Sanatan Sanstha had appointed a coordinator – I referred to her as my rakshak (bodyguard), during the first week at Sanatan Ashram Ponda. She was my soul mate during the stay at the Sanstha and we still manage to keep in touch. She never shared any personal details with me but she was an angel to me. She would fuss around me like a mother hen. I appreciate her help and have promised myself that I will do anything to rescue her from the clutches of the sanstha.

Rakshak and her melancholy

She was different from others, I got the feeling that even when she was with me night and day at Sanatan Sanstha. She was always smiling – all sadhaks at Sanatan Ashram Ponda do it as a matter of practise. But her smile had a sense of melancholy, well-hidden but still present. She would not share anything personal with me but after some time; particularly when she felt that I was about to leave the sanstha, she opened up. She opened up so that I could realise my dilemma and take a positive step. She was always eager to help and would be the first to volunteer for any seva, she did not like to go out and meet people but still she forced herself to take outside seva. She hid her emotions very well but I noticed tears behind her eyes many times. She found my behaviour very erratic and was always ready to criticise. She would not mind if I stopped talking to her, started ignoring her. She was patient, waiting for me to speak up and then she would behave as if nothing had gone wrong between us.

She was an enigma. She appeared to practise all that was preached by Sanatan Sanstha yet she was not affected by it. She had her mind and was not afraid to use it when required. The sanstha appeared to be in awe of her and generally left her alone.

No contact no worries

Unlike my case, she did not receive any visitors nor did she receive any calls from her family. She always had a plain and simple mobile with her and I caught her several times as if she was waiting for a call. Always waiting for a call, always expecting a call, but nobody ever called her up and she also never seemed to call anybody. She always wore simple sarees donated to the ashram. Her blouses were all ill-fitting but she carried herself with aplomb. She appeared to be surviving on the donation given by Sanatan Ashram Ponda. The sanstha gave some pocket money to women sadhaks for out of pocket expenses. It was given only to those whose families did not support them and was not given to male sadhaks.

She had dark complexion but very sharp features and long hair. A beautiful and striking woman. She appeared to be middle aged like me but the worry lines on her face gave an impression of wisdom gained through pain and experience rather than age.

Did she have a family? Was there somebody waiting for her return? What was the secret behind her melancholy?  

She would go out of the way to help me. This was limited to me only as to others she was helpful but she never crossed a limit and kept her distance from everyone else. I, too, felt drawn to her and shared several intimate secrets with her even before I trusted her completely.

Was my trust and confidence misplaced? Was the rakshak an informer of my husband or worse still of Sanatan Sanstha? Would the rakshak become a bhakshak?

Life at Sanatan Ashram Ponda

Sanatan Sanstha immediately made it clear that it was displeased with the results of my husband’s visit to Sanatan Ashram Ponda. They had expected me to either make him join or provoke a fight. Neither happened despite the sanstha’s and my best efforts. I pointed this out to the sadhaks, but they were not pleased. They said that this was due to my emotional attachment with my family. I had not yet surrendered myself in spirit, mind and body to my Guru, Dr Jayant Athavale. I had to learn to let go and as part of the process, I was instructed to spend more time to remove personality defects. The personality defect removal process is the cornerstone of spirituality practise at Sanatan Sanstha. As it becomes clear later on, it is also a very powerful psychological tool in the hands of some selected sadhaks.

Sanatan reworks my schedule

The pain at having failed my Sanatan during a critical process weighed heavily on my mind. I also agreed with them that I was at fault, my emotions had got better of my devotion towards my Guru and hence I had failed. I agreed to spend more time to remove the personality defects. This would lead to less time for other activities; sevas as well as less free time.

Sanatan Sanstha also asked me to switch off my mobile for some time and not to meet any visitors. As such I had only one visitor during the previous month, so I agreed with them. Switching off the mobile was a difficult decision as my family was my only contact with the outside world. I had started to miss them so much that I could not sleep without speaking to my husband during the night. But, perhaps they were right. I needed to be emotionally detached from my family so that I could follow my Guru’s, Dr Jayant Athavale’s instructions and embark on the true path and discover the spirituality within me.

Family loses touch

The decision by Sanatan Sanstha to make me switch off the mobile resulted in my family losing touch with me. I now started devoting more time for personality defect removal process. The auto-suggestion sessions now took up most of my time. Though the sanstha recommended only 3-4 sessions per day, I was made to undergo 8-10 sessions for the next 10 days. I lost any interest in food and would only eat very meagre food.

Such intensive sessions and loss of touch with the outer world made for a very heavy cocktail and I fainted during one such session.

Sanatan Sanstha took this as evidence that evil spirits (read my family) was trying to entice me back to the materialistic world and were interfering with my sadhana. I was given any treatment nor shown to any doctor.

My “rakshak” came to the rescue. I was in a catch 22 situation; but she deftly handled the situation for me. She talked to the sadhaks who mattered and asked them to put me under her. She would supervise my activities and my behaviour. They agreed.

The impact of my husband’s visit and inability to provoke him had very negative impact on my life at Sanatan Ashram Ponda. I had to undergo sustained sessions of personality defect removal process and also stop contact with my family. My rakshak came to the rescue once again.

Sanatan Sanstha allots work

Sanatan Sanstha and its fortress

Sanatan Sanstha has a vast ashram at Ramnathi, Goa. It can accommodate hundreds of sevaks at a time. Sanatan Ashram Ponda is virtually a well-stocked fortress and can sustain itself for about a month without the need for restocking. The ashram has also been constructed in such a manner that there is only one entry and exit gate. However, all floors can be reached through an internal corridor as well as a tar road from outside. All floors have convenient entry and exit points which can be used for defensive purposes as well as quick exit as per demands of the situation. An architect has spent considerable time and effort in designing it.

Different sevas at Sanatan Sanstha

Sanatan Sanstha has used intelligent organizational strategies which can put well-organized companies to shame. There are different sections operating within the Sanatan Ashram Ponda. I was given a detailed guided tour to each of the sections or vibhaags as they are referred to. Work is allotted as per the need of the sanstha and the ability of the sadhak. The main vibhaags are

1. Publications
2. Kitchen
3. Upkeep
4. Outside work
5. Information Technology

The different vibhaags have sub-vibhaags; like publications department has three main sections; one dealing with newsletters (dailies, weeklies, fortnightlies and monthlies – published in different languages), another with publications of holy texts and one dealing with online content – publications mainly). Each of these vibhaags are run and managed by the sadhaks themselves. One person is in charge and others run the show. All these have modern equipment; for example the kitchen has a roti maker that can turn out more than 1000 rotis in an hour. Sadhaks have to devote a fixed amount of time daily in one activity.

How are my abilities judged?

Sanatan Sanstha, as part of its induction processes moves me through different vibhaags. I get to spend three to four days in each of them. A feedback is taken both from me as well as the vibhaag in charge. At the end of the process, a baithak (meeting) is held and my work allocation is decided.

I am under tremendous stress during the initial month as my family has not visited me. Hence, I am excused from any permanent work allocation. However, I am reminded about this on an almost daily basis. This creates more stress in me as I feel that I am a burden on the other sadhaks.

The wordings used by the sadhaks are so magical that they touch the heart. They use the feelings towards my family and slowly turn me against them.

Anyhow, after about a month at Sanatan Ashram Ponda, I am given a fixed time schedule. It consists of kitchen work. I am responsible for milling the flour on a daily basis. It takes about an hour but I feel a sense of responsibility and do it with utmost bhav towards my Guru; Dr Jayant Athavale. The work is routine and does not require any direct supervision, yet my supervisor checks on me every now and then and praises my work style in front of others. She is a very kindly person; she has been associated with Sanatan Sanstha since last 13 years.

The sense of attachment with the sanstha grows in geometric proportion to the work allotted to me.

The Journey So Far

I encounter Sanatan Sanstha

How did I encounter Sanatan Sanstha? I am a spiritual person and always believed that I had a higher purpose in life. I always felt and still feel that Hindu samaj is under attack and Hindu Dharma or Sanatan Dharma is being targeted by everyone, irrespective of caste, creed, gender or religion. I am brought up in a metro and cosmopolitan city and move to a small town after marriage. Marriage, particularly a Hindu marriage, comes with its set of restrictions.

I think I first encountered Sanatan during one of the religious gatherings. They put up their stalls at such places. I was attracted to it and I must have purchased some of their publications and products. I also must have given my contact details there.

What I remember very distinctly is their first contact. A phone call from a woman invited me to their satsang. I was expecting a hall full of people but was surprised at the very small presence. The topic is not relevant (I don’t remember it…) but I lost interest and wandered off. There was a small exhibition area and I was going through their activities and various publications. A sadhak approached me and offered to explain the mission of Sanatan Sanstha.

The Zeal of Sanatan Sanstha

He was very passionate about the sanstha and its mission and various activities. I interrupted him and commented on the small presence. This was the opening he was searching for. We are taught to take advantage of such issues. We are taught by Dr Jayant Athavale to turn our disadvantages into our advantages.

The sadhak immediately launched into a tirade against all non-believers, he said that Hindus are a divided lot, they are divided by the politicians and the media. They are not allowed to become one; because if we become one we will become the greatest strength on earth and nobody can dominate us, nobody can dictate to us. Everyone is afraid of us and they want to keep us under their feet.

True, but this was about Hindus, what about Sanatan Sanstha?

Another opening and another tirade.

He now equates Sanatan Sanstha with Hindus. Without a single pause, he continues to explain the mission of Dr Jayant Athavale. The mission is the establishment of the Hindu Rashtra by 2023 based on the principles of Sanatan Dharma. He goes on about the atrocities heaped upon Sanatan, shows me various articles in the media and explains that they are targeting Hindu Dharma and Sanatan Sanstha.

I am not very convinced but still he has managed to create a doubt in my mind. A doubt that will be explored in future by the sanstha. An opening has been made and I have been marked by them.

They say that the first impression is the last impression; I beg to differ. Impressions are created over time. Your impressions can be manipulated over time by skilled persons like Dr Jayant Athavale and his band of followers. People who have studied human psychology can manipulate people like me to meet their selfish ends.

Freedom at last

The transit and Sanatan Sanstha

Sanatan Sanstha has identified the route, has made fool proof plans and coordinated my escape. My escape from a stifling environment, from relationships that were binding me down and were not allowing me to fly away, were not allowing me to follow the spiritual path and were stopping me from going on the path of Moksha. I am free, totally free.

Why am I feeling empty inside me? Is it because of the tensions, is it because of the hunger (I have not eaten anything throughout the day) or is it the feeling of Chaitanya? Am I really free?

I reach Sanatan Sanstha ashram Devad. I am not accustomed to traveling alone but the sadhaks have told me that I have to make this journey alone. It is symbolic, very symbolic. I am touched, I have cried throughout the journey and am excited to have at last reached my destination. The Devad ashram is only a transit point, it exists to filter the essentials from the non-essentials.

I catch an auto from the bus-stop and reach the ashram. As per the instructions, I call up my husband and inform him that I am at Panvel and I am safe. Why should I tell him? I am leaving him finally. I don’t question the instructions, but the first doubt comes to my mind.

Why inform my husband?

The Sanatan Sanstha Ashram Devad is a welcome sight. I feel as if I have reached a holy place; I bow down my head and kiss the steps. Some sadhaks are loitering near the entrance. They ask my identity and immediately a couple of them take me to the main room. Others close the main gates arnd arrange themselves around it.

The first question I am asked is; have I informed my husband? Have I told him that I am at Devad ashram? Have I given a written statement at the police station? No questions about my health, if I have eaten anything, nothing? I reply to all their questions and take a look at the main room. There are several other sadhaks and all appear to be waiting for something to happen; they appear to be tense.

I am given something to eat and I retire for the night. I am accompanied by two or three female sadhaks. They too appear nervous but don’t discuss anything. We go to sleep, but I cannot sleep. I lie awake the full night thinking about my Guru, Dr Jayant Athavale and seekings his blessings.

The next morning, I again notice many sadhaks roaming around in the compound. All people appear to be tense. I have not yet switched on my mobile. Now, I am advised to do so and respond to all calls and tell everyone that I am at Sanatan Sanstha Ashram Devad.

This cycle repeats for one complete week. There are no activities throughout the day but only counseling sessions. The police phone me up one day to gather my whereabouts. I am told to expect the call and am also told to contact one person before responding. I reply as per his instructions.

What is Sanatan Sanstha waiting for? Why am I not allowed to proceed towards Goa?

What is Personality Defect Removal Process at Sanatan Sanstha

Sanatan Sanstha asks me to remove Personality Defects

Sanatan Sanstha is now dictating all my thoughts. Their process of personality development is through the removal of personality defects. They assume that once such defects are removed, positive personality traits will take their place. I have identified several such personality defects and freely share them with the sanstha. I do not feel ashamed about sharing my inner feelings with them; frankly, I have never shared such feelings with even my husband and mind you, we were quite open with each other. I suddenly start feeling liberated, I feel that I have been repressed throughout my life.

I am asked to write down all defects. I write down two complete pages. Ego is identified as my biggest personality defect. All sadhaks agree and I am asked to with them; I don’t think ego is the biggest one. They convince me that I don’t agree because of my ego.

The personality defect removal process is referred to as PDR in short. It is a very important part of our sadhana. We spend about 60 to 70% of our time in this. Due to this, we become convinced that we are full of defects and only the Guru, none other than Dr. Jayant Athavale can rectify these defects. We are also told that during this process, we should always ask for directions from God and our Guru.

The Process of Personality Defect Removal

The personality defect removal process is very simple and elaborate. It consists of the following steps:

• Identify our own personality defects and write them down. Write down the corresponding positive trait in front of each one.
• Make a chart of auto suggestions. A chart is provided for ready reference.
• The process of framing auto-suggestions and the frequency of auto-suggestion sessions is decided by the kendra in charge, a person who oversees the kendra. He will consult the zila sevak, if required.
• Sanatan Sanstha has recommended that I do between five to ten sessions daily. Each session takes about 30 minutes. My personality defects are very deep rooted and will take many such sessions to be removed.
• Take a pledge that such defects will not be repeated in future.
• Do atonement if the defect occurs again. Atonement can be done by sacrificing things one likes the most. I like to eat good food and interact with my daughter. I reduce my interactions with my daughter. I rarely speak to her. This is my atonement.
• Report the progress every day.

The process is now taking up most of my time. I hardly get time to complete household chores and my family suffers. During arguments, I tell them that the fruits of my sadhana will benefit the complete family. My good deeds will benefit the complete family. So what if they remain hungry once in a while or if the home becomes dirty and disorganized? These are all external issues; they do not matter to the self. I forget that once upon a time, I had told the family that Karma cannot be shared with others.

The family is now in a total state of disarray. My husband and my loving daughter are aliens to me and I am an alien to them. I do not bother. I am removing all negative energies from me; I am one with Sanatan Sanstha.

How can you save Sanatan Sanstha?

• ·         The first step in Sanatan Sanstha’s inoculation campaign is to identify gullible people like me. People who has a holier than thou approach towards themselves – like me. I was so full of myself, so taken up by my vision of the world and my exalted position in it. They start slow. The first step is to attract spiritual persons or people with a spiritual bend of mind. We attend satsangs and are told to pray for the well-being of the nation.
• ·         The second step is now to reinforce this bond. They concentrate on Hindu Dharma or Sanatan Dharma. The attacks on Hindus are highlighted. The situation in the country and the prosecution of Hindus are discussed. Followers are encouraged to speak about the atrocities. Their website is full of such articles. I remember once when riding my two-wheeler, I dashed against a person from another community and he abused me. I spoke about this in one of the satsangs and the other sadhaks treated this as an attacked on a poor Hindu woman. I also started believing this.
• ·         Sanatan Sanstha knows that the bond is still weak. They now concentrate on my mind. They talk about the guru and gurushisha parampara. The importance of guru for spiritual upliftment is stressed repeatedly. “Saints” now join in for the discourses. The header of the main page of the website shows an image of a discipline offering respects to his guru.
• ·         I am asked to do naamjap, the sanstha says that naamjap – taking the name of Gods is different from meditation. Naamjap yields results. I believe them. Today, I know that meditation and naamjap are same as per Hindu Shastra; as per Hindu Dhrama. Sanatan wants to differentiate itself and hence shows that both are different.
• ·         Stickers with Gods and Goddesses’ names are purchased by me. I stick them all around my home. I think of the sanstha all throughout the day. This leads to the first conflict with my husband. Broken Dreams and Broken Relationships. A crack is formed; waiting to be exploited.
• ·         My family, my home, my fort no longer appeal to me. I think Sanatan Sanstha, I dream about my Guru and all my actions are dictated by the sanstha.
• ·         The focus now shifts from attacks on Hindu Dharma to attacks on Sanatan Sanstha. I am asked to do naamjap at different times. Someone phones me and informs me that evil spirits will be attacking the sanstha at a particular time. I can save the sanstha through my bhakti. I have done naamjap several times during nights, waking up at 2 am, 3 am or even not sleeping throughout the night. I became so habituated that I used to get up at 4 a.m. to do naamjap for many years.

The sanstha has gained control of my mind. I am no longer thinking rationally. I am their slave. I am a sadhak. I belong to Santan Sanstha.

Lies lies and more lies

Broken Dreams and Broken Relationships

This is the start of the end. Lies lead to mistrust. Mistrust in the persons who love you the most. People who really care about you. Mistrust leads to broken dreams and broken relationships. This is the beginning of the end. Sanatan Sanstha knows this, understands this, and most of all wants this. There is nothing spiritual about this, nothing religious about this, there is no linkage between Sanatan Dharma or Hindu Dharma. It is all about mind control.

Human beings are social animals, right. They want the company of others, others who are like them, who think like them, who act like them. The social acceptance theory comes into play. I started seeking others like me. More importantly, I left those who were not like me. It started with my friend circle. I saw them as inferior beings, engaged in futile pursuits. I was a superior being. I lost contact with them, I broke contact with them. My closest friends, some of them so close that they knew all about me. I did not keep in touch.

I had a friend, she was facing a crisis in her life, I went to her and told her to embrace Sanatan Sanstha. She was shocked, her husband had just died and she was worried about making ends meet, and I was advising her to leave everything behind. I was so inconsiderate. Today, she is helping me to live again, helping me to come to terms with life and to start a new life. She did, she fought against odds, she took risks. She is my helping hand, my guiding star.

Lying is a sin:

All religions including Sanatan Dharma or Hindu Dharma teaches us that lying is a sin. Yudhishthira, the Dharmaraj, uttered just one lie in his lifetime and still he had to offer penance before he got an entry in the Heaven. He had performed innumerable good deeds and accumulated good karma. Yet Sanatan Sanstha directly or indirectly motivates its sadhaks to tell lies or to speak untruths. Spiritual upliftment should start with honesty and truthfulness, the sanstha on the face of it, shows that it does not support such misdemeanors. Then why does it motivate people to speak lies? It is not only about mind control. They tell people like me that whatever you do in the sanstha, it is acceptable if it is for the good of the sanstha. The guru; HH Dr. Jayant Athavale is there to protect you.

Nobody can share one’s sins. Remember the story about Maharishi Valmiki? Maharishi Valmiki was a notorious bandit, he used to rob innocent people of their wealth. Once a saint asked him the reason for such evil deeds. Valmiki replied that he robbed so that he could feed his family. The saint then asked him whether his sins would also be shared by his family? Valmiki decided to ask them and was very much surprised by the answer. His family out rightly rejected him and told him that they would not share his sins. He realized his mistake and changed his path and took to spiritual pursuits and became the great Maharishi Valmiki.

Lying is a sin, no matter what is the outcome. And yes, nobody can share your sins, you have to carry the burden yourself. Even Sanatan Sanstha cannot change this, this is as per Sanatan Dharma. 

Sanatan Sanstha is not Sanatan Dharma. It can never become one, it can never come close to the Eternal Truth.

Attack against Hindu Dharma and Sanatan Sanstha

Evil spirits attacking us

The die is cast; the actors are ready and the main character is me. Sanatan Sanstha has identified a gullible candidate. I start believing that everyone is attacking Hindu Dharma, everyone is after Sanatan Dharma. Small incidents; say a person attacked in a remote place, is made out to be a part of a conspiracy. I do not question them, others in the group do not question them.  Their newsletters are full of such stories. This is spiritual human psychology at its play, the one propagated by Dr. Jayant Athavale. Who are they? You may question them; they will tell you THEY are everyone who does not believe in Sanatan Sanstha. They are evil spirits; evil spirits that chase you when you try to do meditation - they call it Naamjap, evil spirits chase you when you go about your daily work. These evil spirits try to disturb you because they know you are doing something good. I used to yawn when meditating, I was told that this is again the work of evil spirits, they are trying to disturb you, do not get disturbed, our guru; Dr. Jayant Athavale, will protect you.

Santan Sanstha and Social Acceptance theory:

There is a concept in psychology, it is called the social acceptance theory. We look around us before deciding on a course of action. If others are doing something, we tend to follow them, even if we know it is wrong. The scientific reasoning is too detailed to be understood. But Sanatan Sanstha uses this theory in captivating their audience. All of us – the seekers as we were called, used to be asked about our thoughts while doing naamjap. Some of the experiences, there were always a couple of them during all discussions, were out of the world and all were focussed around Dr. Jayant Athavale. A sadhak would say that she felt that Guruji (he is referred as ParamPujya – PP in short) came on a garuda and took her away so she could fly away from her troubles. Others would not join in with more and more outrageous stories. Initially, I would give a lame story and everyone would give me a black eye, but through experience and with a need to belong to this group, I also concocted such experiences.

I started lying. The main point is that I started telling lies.

Lying is Good if the objective is good:

This is the mantra of Sanatan Sanstha, if you lie for doing work of the sanstha, it is not a lie. Nothing bad will happen. Dr. Jayant Athavale is there to protect you.

Broken dreams and broken relationships. 

I started lying to my family. Small lies, insignificant lies, needless lies. An important laxman rekha was crossed, the sanstha made me cross the rekha. The explanation to justify such lies was also implanted in my mind. Remember auto-suggestion therapy. Slowly and steadily, I was made to change my beliefs. Till this time, I never used to tell lies to my husband. Now, I lied to him because I felt that he was opposing me, he was part of the evil system, Sanatan Sanstha made a devil out of me. I broke the trust of my family, not once, not twice but repeatedly. Day in and day out.

The evil spirits had taken control, Sanatan Sanstha had taken control of my mind. All in the name of spirituality, all in the name of God.

Why did Sanatan Sanstha attract me so much?

Sanatan Sanstha and Attraction

You must be wondering why would anybody be affected so much by Sanatan Sanstha. The “offering” that the sanstha puts in front of people is very appealing and put in a simplistic manner. They cloak the wordings to sound scientific. There is a beautiful concoction of Hindu Dharma and science and ordinary things are given a very spiritual meaning. They publish dailies, weeklies and even monthly newsletters. The articles are all about the daily news and about spirituality. The language is simplistic and easy to understand.

So what is the rub?

I always considered myself apart from the hoi-poi, the ordinary people who go about their daily activities without any thought of spiritual upliftment. The constant attacks on Hinduism used to affect me deeply. I always had an urge to do something about it but felt helpless. My family used to laugh at all these feelings. They would never support me, I used to feel. They never understood me. Oh! How wrong I was…

Sanatan Sanstha looks around for such people, people like me who are gullible, who are carried away by good words and who feel that the world does not understand them. Why only Sanatan, there are thousands of such organisations. They do the same thing. Why is Sanatan different from them? Why do people hate Sanatan so much?

I don’t know about others, but ask me and I will say that I hate Sanatan Sanstha because of what it did to me. How it duped me with the sweet words and the promise of Mooksh. How it utilised my feelings and played around with me.

Was I thinking rationally?

The question that arises is, was I ever thinking rationally? Why was I affected so much that I left my house, my family and all my relationship behind me and ran away? Was I hypnotised? Was I drugged? What happened?

The answer lies in psychology, pure human psychology. And Dr. Jayant Athavale has used this as a powerful weapon, a weapon through which he can control the minds of people. Make them do anything that he wants to do, when he wants to do and in the manner, that he desires. People say that he uses a branch of hypnosis; called Ericksonian Hypnosis. But I also know that a person cannot be hypnotised without his or her permission. Jayant Athavale can hypnotise one person at a time, how can he hypnotise so many of them?

The truth is somewhere in between. Sanatan Sanstha uses a powerful blend of psychological methods to capture the minds. The mind control techniques rely on a powerful tool of psychology called Auto Suggestion. The so called sadhaks first identify the individuals who can be diverted, converted and then controlled. Trust me, I was there, I was controlled by them. I was converted by them.

The methods are so simple but so powerful that we accept them without any questions. We accept them and follow them and use them in our daily life. Till one day, we lose control over our lives. We give our control to Sanatan Sanstha.

They win….

We lose, we lose ourselves and hand over ourselves to them.